Songs In Blue

I’ve finally got around to answering the last couple of questions that people asked me (months ago).  Raul, Sharon and Lance – thanks for the questions!

Matt, what is the best quality you’ve found in Dayna?

The best quality I’ve found in Dayna is her passion – whether it’s being passionate about travel, family, friends, photography, writing, sharks, funny dance moves or anything else.  I think quite a few people go through life without this passion and without really enjoying it as much as they could.

Dayna definitely doesn’t fall within this category – she approaches life with a lot of passion and energy that makes being around her really fun and she’s just a fun person to be with because of this.  

If you were to re-live your first encounter, how would it be?

I really liked our first encounter so I’m going to have to be lame and say I wouldn’t change a thing. 

What’s your definition of a perfect relationship?

Tough question and one that I am really not qualified in any way to answer.  Not that that’ll stop me…

OK, so I don’t really know if you could have a “perfect” relationship (that sounds really boring anyway) but I think a “really good” relationship needs to be built around honesty, being able to talk openly about everything and being completely comfortable with someone.  I also think having similar goals in life is really important.

This is assuming of course that two people are attracted two each other and are at roughly the same stage of life e.g. Hugh Hefner can talk openly and be as honest as he wants but dating 20-year old twins (plus another 23-year old girl) is just never going to be part of a perfect relationship…although it may be perfect from his perspective.  And yes, I do watch too much bad reality TV shows - I blame Dayna.

If you were stuck on a desert island, and could only bring 3 things with you (food and water is there, conveniently), and you can’t bring transportation to get you away from there, what would you bring and why?

I’m pretty social and get bored quickly when I’m by myself so I’d love to take some friends with me but I’m going to assume they don’t meet the definition of “things”.  For my benefit I’m also going to assume that the island has a lake that freezes over in winter and electricity – without which some of my choices below become pretty boring (it can be a modern island right?). 

So I would probably go with the following:

1) A laptop with internet and speakers – so I can listen to music, keep in touch over the internet etc.

2) A set of ice skates – because I’ve tried skating once and I was terrible.  I figure learning to skate would entertain me for a good decade and give me something to do after that.  And I haven’t been to the dentist since I was seventeen so I may need a skate to perform some minor dental surgery at some point too.

3) A Wilson volleyball – to keep me company because Tom Hanks would not have got through Castaway without his buddy Wilson and I think I’ll need an imaginary buddy too.

What is the one thing you want to do most before you die?

Well, if I assume that I’m going to live at least a few more decades, the first answer that comes to mind is having children some time between now and death.

If I changed the scenario slightly and I only had twelve months to live then the one thing I would want to do before I died would be to travel the world and see all the places I haven’t got to yet. 

What is your dream job?

My dream job is a work in progress right now.  I’m a tax consultant at the moment so I’ve set the bar pretty low anyway – most jobs will seem pretty amazing after this one.

I wouldn’t mind the “best job in the world” (an island caretaker gig that a guy’s doing in Australia – http://www.islandreefjob.com/) or anything that involved being paid to be a tourist really.  I used to be addicted to travel shows and dreamed of being a presenter on one (which would be amazing) but that is not really that realistic.

My dream job in my current career path would be a CEO or CFO for a company that I really care about.  Being in charge, and influencing something that I am passionate about using the skills that I have would be ideal.

So for now, I have some rough ideas but my dream job remains a work in progress – hopefully I figure it out soon so I can start figuring out how to get the job.     

I have a question…for Matt…What would you do if one of Dayna’s brothers bought a Springboks jersey when he was in South Africa?…

WOW Lance – I expected so much better of you. 

I think the only way to make you see the error of your ways is for you to wear that Springboks jersey to an All Blacks home game against South Africa.  We’ll see if you still like your little jersey then…

Oh and I am so going to buy the next Calgary Flames jersey I see.

For those of you that don’t know, Movember is a fundraising event for men’s health issues, specifically prostate cancer and depression.  The goal is to grow a moustache for the month of November and collect donations.
 
When I asked the man behind The Mo in my life, Matt, what ‘look’ he was going for, this was his response:
“I think Johnny Depp is a big inspiration for the look I am going for (sans goatee) but in reality, it will be more of a ‘dodgy uncle’ sort of look”

Basically, it’s a lip glove/flavour saver combination.  And at only 6 days in, The Mo seems to have a mind of it’s own.  Every morning it seems to double in size and when Matt kisses me, The Mo tickles my lip.
It’s gonna be a long month….

I think the women supporting these men should get something pretty at the end of the month for putting up with the ’70s porn star’ look for 30 days.  It’s for a good cause so I guess I should keep my not-so-keen-on-having-a-Moed-boyfriend to myself.

If you want updates on Matt’s Mo Growing progress you can check out his Mospace at http://nz.movember.com/mospace/127429

Feel free to donate!

This is part three of my question answering saga.  The answers might be taking me awhile but I’m getting through the questions – only a couple more to go after these. 

Thanks Alexbettylou and Courtney for the questions by the way (although I suspect Courtney’s wasn’t intended to be taken too seriously).

If Dayna wanted to go back home and refused to live anywhere else, would you be happy to go too? 

I haven’t thought about this too much yet since it’s not really an option at the moment.  I’m definitely working in New Zealand for another two years at least but I guess once I finish all my final exams and get some fancy letters after my name I can start to think of living somewhere else as an option. 

If Dayna said she wanted to go back home in a few years from now then I would definitely be happy to go along for at least a few years.  I like Canada.  It’s a cool place and I would love to spend some more time there.  And it’d be great to get to know Dayna’s family a bit better.   

My only tiny little issue with Canada is the cold weather.  The fact that I hate cold weather and it was the middle of winter the only time I’ve been there probably doesn’t help.  But I’d be willing to risk some mild hypothermia if it meant Dayna could be near her family.

As for living there for good – I don’t know for sure (sorry, kind of sitting on the fence with that answer).  I love living in New Zealand and I couldn’t really imagine spending the rest of my life somewhere else.  Dayna seems to quite like it here too but if she turned around one day and decided she wanted to leave for good then I don’t really know what I would do yet.  I think I will just cross that bridge if I get to it.

Anyway, the plan at the moment is to be ridiculously rich so we can afford to fly back and forth between countries whenever we like – that should solve most of the problem.

Matt. Why do you have to live in New Zealand? I would much rather you live in Canada so I could see my big sis more.

Well…aside from the fact that I was born here, I’m stuck here at the moment anyway with the whole getting qualified thing as mentioned above.  So it’s not really my fault. 

There is also the fact that New Zealand is AWESOME anyway.  Really you should just come here and visit Dayna.  We can watch whales, swim with dolphins, climb volcanoes, go Bungy jumping, do a Haka, get a Moko, play rugby, ride sheep…whatever touristy things you want to do – you’ll love it.  Maybe finish school first though so your mum (or is it “mom”?) won’t get mad with me.

There’s also the issue of the weather in Canada though.  I’m pretty sure I’m allergic to cold weather.  So if you could get started on making winters warmer over there then that’d be great.  Maybe buy a big gas-guzzling car and don’t walk anywhere.  Tell all your friends to do the same.  Global warming should sort out the rest. 

Actually, if Al Gore is right then global warming will probably put New Zealand under water soon enough and we’ll have to move.  And Canada will have nice warm winters by that stage too… 

What is it about Dayna that you miss most anyway?  Is it her attempts at dancing like Beyonce?  If it is then we could maybe arrange for a little video of it to be put up on YouTube. 

I guess it could also be her crazy-excited laugh that you miss.  The really excited-can’t breathe-actually kind of scary-laugh.  If so, I could send you a tape of that too.  Or you could just find a slightly breathless Banshee and get her to scream at you.  Or try cutting some metal with an electric saw. 

(Just joking – Dayna, your laugh is like a beautiful symphony to me)

Anyway Courtney, I’m sorry you don’t get to see much of your sister at the moment.  Rumour has it that Dayna may be making an appearance in Canada next year anyway.  Hopefully that will be enough for now.  At least until we see how the whole global warming plan pans out.

Sorry for the tardiness, round two of my answers are below (thanks for the questions Jon)…

What was your greatest accomplishment between the age of 5 and 15?

Good question – I don’t think I have ever really stopped to think about it before now.  I didn’t really achieve anything groundbreaking by the age of 15 so it’s quite hard to think of one thing…when I was 15 I’m sure I would have listed some sporting achievement as my greatest accomplishment but my perspective is a little different now. 

Since I have to pick out one thing, I think it was turning my life at school around from being horrible to teachers and failing everything to actually starting to do pretty well by the time I was 15.

I had quite a few “issues” at school early on and I wasn’t exactly a model student for my teachers.  I basically spent the first half of my education in some form of detention.  I got really good at writing out lines (teachers made us write out a “code of conduct” repeatedly) and picking up rubbish (student labour was cheaper than hiring cleaners apparently) but I wasn’t good at much else at school up until I was around 13.  Luckily, there were a few awesome teachers who saw through all the immaturity and believed in me enough to keep trying. 

And eventually they got through; I grew up, set some goals, realised I actually had to work hard if I wanted to get anywhere, and went from a straight F student on his way to dropping out of high school to the joint top of my year by the time I turned 15. 

Without growing up and turning things around at school there would be no way I would be where I am now so I’m pretty thankful for it now.  Although, if I had cured cancer by the time I was 15 that would be a much more interesting story.  Oh well, there’s always the 15-30 age bracket for me to achieve something more interesting…

What is the best non-alcoholic drink that you have ever had in your life?

Hmmm…there are a lot of options.  My favourite is probably just the fruit smoothies I used to make all the time when I was a bartender.  I can’t even remember what went in them as it changed every time (depending on what fruit and syrups were floating around behind the bar at that stage).  They were amazing anyway.  As far as generic off-the-shelf drinks, either Coke Zero or Vanilla Coke would be my favourite.

What do you think the church is good for in todays society?

Disclaimer: I haven’t been to church since MC Hammer was cool so this is definitely not my area of expertise.  I apologise in advance for not having a more impressive and comprehensive answer. 

In my opinion, the main thing that church is good for in today’s society is teaching good morals and values.  People are encouraged to live up to these morals and values and they probably live their lives a lot more altruistically than they would have if they had never been to church. 

If the church encourages more people to help those in need and live better, more unselfish lives then I think that is a pretty good contribution.

Alright, (as most of you would know as you read it) I was asked a few questions in one of Dayna’s earlier posts.  In order to keep myself in Dayna’s good books I am getting the ball rolling and answering the first couple of questions for now (I’ll get to the others as soon as I can).  So Barbetti, thanks for the questions, my answers are below…

Why don’t you have a blog?

I did have a blog while I was studying in San Diego and travelling around North America but I don’t have one at the moment.  The main reason I had a blog while I was overseas was so my family / friends could keep in touch and see what I was up to whereas now keeping in touch is a bit easier (living in the same country and all).

So I guess a big reason for not having a blog is because I think I would struggle for readers – a blog about travelling across North America is a lot more interesting to read than a blog about the day-to-day adventures of a tax consultant (although in saying that I would so read that blog…).

I think if I’m living outside of New Zealand then I will most likely pick up writing a blog again as I did enjoy it while it lasted (and it’s good to look back on one day).  For now though, I am happy as a reader.

How did you and Dayna meet? And what was your initial impression of her?

Alright, let’s see.  It was November 2006.  I was working the “early” shift at Jet, the bar I worked at for a few years while at university (early meant finishing around midnight which qualifies it as a “very late” shift for me these days).

I was nearing the end of my shift when an old high school friend of mine came in with two Canadian girls in tow.  I hadn’t seen him in years so I was pretty pleased.  And he was obviously pleased to be able to show off in front of the girls (I remember him exaggerating “I know all the bartenders in Wellington!”) and it was working on at least one of them (*cough* Danielle *cough*).

So one of the girls (Dayna) ordered a round of tequila shots and I obliged (very quickly, with lemon / salt and a smile might I add).  Dayna then proceeded to complain to me (at length) about how much they cost.  I just clenched my teeth and nodded sympathetically (whilst noting her generous tip of ZILCH).  So my initial impression wasn’t exceptionally great (a cheap, whiny traveler who doesn’t tip – although I admit I did think she was cute).

I finished my shift shortly after and went around the other side of the bar to talk to my old high school buddy (who I hadn’t seen in years).  Unfortunately he had eyes for only one person that night (*cough* Danielle *cough*).  At this point I noticed that the Cheap Whiny Traveler looked kind of lonely sitting at the bar by herself.  I had a good amount of experience at playing third wheel so I forgave her (a little bit) for her earlier whining.  And besides, I needed somewhere to sit.

So we got talking and had one of those great first conversations.  You know the ones:

“I have lots of brothers and sisters”

“Oh my god, I have lots of brothers and sisters!”

“I like U2”

“Oh my god, I like U2!”

“I like chocolate”

“Oh my god, I like chocolate…”

Anyway, we talked for hours and I decided I really liked her (and apparently she didn’t mind me either).  She even wrote me a note telling me this (titled “Mr Hot Bartender”).

We had a few adventures before she left Wellington like when Dayna’s parents, who were back in Canada (obviously), were alerted to their child being missing.  What a great first impression to make on a girl’s parents right? ‘So you’re the one who kidnapped my daughter then?’ For the record, no I did not, at any point, kidnap Dayna.

By the time Dayna left Wellington my first impression had changed to be of a happy, passionate, caring, funny, cute, clumsy, awesome girl that I was very sad to being saying goodbye to.  Little did I know that after fifty or so phone calls, several thousand emails, a meet up in San Diego, a month in Canada and now a year of living together, I would get to spend every day with this girl.

Lucky me.

All the nerves, insecurities, worries, and excitement I had felt over the last few months had reached a boiling point.  I thought I was going to throw up as I gathered my things.  My legs were almost too weak to carry me through, what seemed to be, the longest corridor ever made.  My mind was racing so fast I thought it would explode as I neared the open door.  Then, as quickly as my panic had started, it was over.  I saw him.
His smile was all the reassurance I needed.

A year ago today, I got off the plane.

It’s been really bugging me lately that my family and friends don’t have much of a chance to get to know Matt.  Granted, they know quite a bit but most of it is from what I’ve told them.  I wanted Matt to have a chance to give his perspective so he’s writing a guest post!
 
He needs a few ideas about what to write, so I thought you could ask him a few questions.  My mom’s already asked one, “Do you think you’ll play Badminton again?”  That’s right, Matt was quite the pro a few years back before he got a really bad back injury. 
 
Matt will decide which questions he’ll answer, so try to make them as creative as possible!  You can ask your question as a comment on this post, by emailing me (songsinblue AT gmail DOT com), or via twitter.

Ain’t love the sweetest thing*

*The Sweetest Thing by U2

Matt has been buying a lot of clothes and shoes (4 pair in 2 weeks) updating his wardrobe, for good reason.  He’s been going to the gym, we’re both trying to eat a bit healthier and as a result (all bias aside) the dude is looking GOOD!

The only problem is that he’s become a little addicted to a certain brand…
Case in point,

And that’s not including what’s in the wash.