Songs In Blue

I’ve had a lot of weekends away exploring this amazing country I’ve come to call home and traveled as far away as Sydney, but most of my time in 2009 was spent settling.  Settling into living away from family, my relationship with Matt and really, just life in general.  I also learned a lot about myself, got (somewhat) out of debt and even lost some weight!  I’ve done a lot and had a lot happen to me in my short 22 years and it was nice to have a bit of a rest year.

However, I think it may have been another calm before yet another storm.  What I didn’t mention in my last post is that in addition to my Dad having ALS, my Mom was also waiting for results from a scan.  She’s ok, so that’s good news, but it’s made me think of what’s next for me.

Luckily, I’m currently on a very relaxing holiday in the South Island with Matt.  We’ve been swimming, lying on the beach, taking lots of photographs (that I can’t upload now) and reading (The Lovely Bones for me, and James Bond for him).  Yesterday we went on an absolutely beautiful 5 hour coastal walk which left us both blistered and sore this morning.  Totally worth it though.  Tonight we’re going to ring in the New Year with dinner and drinks, just the two of us.

Hopefully, by the end of this trip I’ll have decided what my next move is but no matter what happens in the next year, I can take it.

So 2010, bring it on.

It’s pretty overwhelming when complete strangers take the time to send some love our way.  Thank you, everyone, for your kind words, I’ve really appreciated them.

This is new territory for me so I’m not sure how to handle it.  I think there’s going to be a lot of unwanted change over the next few months that will take some adjusting, but I just want to enjoy NOW and worry about what’s next LATER (much like my Dad).  Matt is the polar opposite and just wants to know what’s going to happen already!  That’s just another way we balance each other out. 
All I know right now is that I’m hoping to get to Vancouver for a visit early March for Spring vacation.

I’m not about to go sit in a corner feeling sorry for myself.  My dad’s not!  He’s planning on going on a Caribbean cruise with his wife (or soon to be, they’re getting married while there) in February! I told him he should go swimming with sharks and he said he would if he could!
That’s not to say that this last week hasn’t had an effect on me (I’m pretty sure I’ve cried more than I have in the last 2 years) but things happen, you deal with it and life goes on.  So we’re still going on our South Island trip, and it’ll be relaxing and fun, DAMMIT! Cause if it isn’t, I might go insane…I also want to do something that gives me a rush, so I’m thinking Bungy jumping. 

Before that, we’ll be spending Christmas at Matt’s Mom’s house.  This year there’s only 6 of us, but I’m sure it’ll be fun – his family is pretty great! Hopefully, the weather stays nice so we can sit on the deck and soak up the sun.

So yeah, that’s where I’m at right now – taking things as they come and hoping it all works out in the end.

Merry Christmas!

Hours after writing that last post, I got a phone call from my Daddy.  I’ve written a few times about him but hardly enough.  I don’t think I could ever write enough words to describe how much he means to me.  And I won’t try, right now, because it would take too long and I just want to get this out.

My Dad’s been off work for a few weeks now because he’s lost feeling and strength in his arm.  Since he drives bus for a living, he didn’t want to risk losing all feeling while behind the wheel.  Originally, he thought it had something to do with discs in his neck messing up his nerves and got an MRI the other day.

He called to let me know that he’s been diagnosed with Lou Gehrig’s disease or ALS.  I’ve only read the first sentence of that site and I’m not ready to read more so I really can’t tell you much about it.  The only thing I care about is there’s no cure and the doctors say my Daddy only has two to five years.

I’m still trying to process it all, so I don’t have much else to say right now except,

I love you, Dad.

Ahh, the much needed update post.  One day I’ll make myself get into a routine of posting, although I wasn’t doing too bad until 3 weeks ago.  Don’t have much of an excuse except that there’s been a lot on my mind that I couldn’t really put into words.  But let’s recap, shall we?

My mom offered to pay for Matt and I to fly up to Canada then take us to Mexico for her birthday NEXT WEEK.  She had good intentions (obviously, it’s her 50th and she wants me there for it) but I just ended up really stressed out about the whole thing.  It was a lot of information to take in over the course of 3 days! 
 I ultimately said no because, a) we’ve had a trip to the South Island (leaving on my mom’s birthday) planned for 6 months and we’d have to cancel everything, and b) it was too last minute and the flight prices were INSANE.  There’s no way I could let my mom (who’s on a solo income as a school bus driver) spend that kind of money.  I would just feel so guilty about it. 
Trust me, it was a really hard decision to make!   It’s my family and I don’t see them often (or at all, with the whole ‘living on the other side of the world’ thing) and I want to make them happy.  I hate disappointing people.  But yeah, after lost sleep and tears (Matt got to witness the Ugly Cry a few times, awesome.) I’m ok with everything.  A trip to Canada might still be in my near future but I’ll talk about that as soon as I get some more info.

Three weeks ago, I went to my first Tweetup. Which I guess, officially makes me a nerd  but  I’m ok with that.  It was quite fun and great to meet new people which was something I felt I needed to do. 
Anyway, a few of the girls there decided we should have a Ladies Night.  So  Wednesday  night about 10 of us met at a bar for a few drinks then headed to a comedy gig!  A lot of conversation, laughter, and maybe a little too much wine was had by all – it was exactly what I needed (minus the hangover/going to work  in the  morning (Hi Mom and Dad!)).
One of the highlights for me was FINALLY meeting Alex who’s blog I’ve been reading for about 2 years now.  She’s originally from the UK (and has a lovely accent) but moved here almost a year ago with her Kiwi boyfriend.  ALL the girls are absolutely amazing and I can’t wait until we get together again!  Next time, I’ll bring my camera.

As I said earlier, Matt and I are going to the South Island for 2 weeks!  We’ve got a pretty awesome trip planned – full of walks, kayaking, and lying on the beach (if the weather gets better)!  One of the places we’re staying has free internet so I’ll make sure to post a few pictures.  I thought I’d see if anyone was interested in Guest Posting while I’m away? I have 6 dates up for grabs so leave a comment or email me if you’re interested!